Cuteness Is Irrelevant -Cat-

I was going to do a cat for the cat theme. Then while we were watching the stormingly exciting finale of Star Trek Voyager season 3, my sister said, "Wouldn't it be cool if there were, like, a race of Borg cats?" and then i thought for a few seconds, and then said, "Emily, you're a fucking genius". I think she thought I was being sarcastic, because I then had to pause the star trek for a few minutes while we resolved the bitch fight that arose**.

Hence, the Borg Cat. Let me reiterate that this was done for the cat theme, because that's one of the two things that i was thinking when I got the idea (the other was "borg cats? Emily, you are the without a doubt the biggest twit i have ever known")

This specification is... irrelevant... to the way the Borg tend to do things, but never mind, here we go. This... erm... Felis Felix Borgus Secundus is a mobile unit designed to operate at great distances from the collective consciousness and other drones for extended periods of time. It is armed and armoured so that it doesn't have to be inconvenienced by situations that are... irrelevant... to its mission. The cat's original fur was... irrelevant... to its function, so it has been replaced with thousands of reticulated splines that can generate the Borg's trademark energy shield with a rotating phase modulation and a modification that allows it to generate localised gravometric pulses that can divert the course of any incoming projectile and melee weapons that have the potential to neutralise the shield. As a result, most attempts to dissuade the Borg cat from its mission will prove... irrelevant. Its eyepiece is equipped with a multitude of imaging filters, including thermal, magnetic, ionic, and many others, allowing the Borg cat to scan freely without suffering loss of image resolution because of... irrelevant... interferance. As with all Borg, the cat is equipped with the ability to function in vacuum, as well as other environments which a normal organism would be loathe to enter. Thus, any adverse conditions are... irrelevant... to the Borg cat's mission. There is a circular blade mounted on the cat's tail, made of concentrated Quadranium alloy, that can rotate at up to 1500 revs per second. This renders any material shielding or bulkhead... irrelevant. The cat's right paw is equipped with a Trilithium-fuelled, antimatter reaction-powered array of power claws that render force fields of any magnitude... irrelevant. The reactor that powers the claws also fuel an energy weapon also mounted in the right arm, capable of vaporising organic matter with a burst of energy using only 8.73% of a full intensity blast, rendering any opposing organic meatbags' efforts to disrupt its mission... irrelevant. At full intensity, the energy weapon is capable of disrupting the shielding of the warp and trans-warp centres used by most space-going species, causing a catastrophic warp core breach which will at best destroy, and at worst immobilise, an enemy ship, rendering them... irrelevant... to the Borg's plans. In an emergency, the Borg cat can shunt power from the right-arm reactor to its shielding, making it capable of withstanding the explosive resultant of a catastrophic antimatter explosion (such as that caused by a warp core breach) at point-blank range, making even the highest-powered explosives used against it... irrelevant.

Hugs, kisses, cuddles, and brightly coloured ribbons, however, are capable of throwing the Borg cat's cognitive functions into complete disarray and destroying it and everything in a .74 light year radius in an enormous antimatter explosion. But such speculation is... irrelevant.



**dramatisation ( i always wanted to say that)